Dear MTV, I fear the end of our relationship is on the horizon. This has been going on for years now; I watch your Video Music Awards, I'm disappointed, and I convince myself that you'll do better next year. Then, a year later, I sit down and watch again. The cycle repeats itself.I've given so you many chances, MTV. When we were young, I was fascinated with your awards. Eddie Vedder would spout off about politics and Ticketmaster when he accepted his Moonman. Nirvana performed, electrifying the crowd and caused bassist Krist Novaselic to inflict a head injury upon himself. And your hosts, they were so funny! Chris Rock's first hosting gig in 1997 left me rolling on the floor. MTV, you were so interesting back then. The things you would show me, the things I would learn, the albums I would buy. What's happened to us?

This year, I almost left you when you told me you were moving to Miami for the weekend. I imagined the celebrities attending in bathing suits, the obnoxious end-of-summer audience, the over-the-top partying that is Miami's trademark, and I thought we were over right then and there. But you worked on me, MTV, and told me it would be amazing. You made funny commercials with Dave Chappelle and touted appearances by Jon Stewart. Your list of nominees sucked, but it usually does so I was able to forgive. And on Sunday night, I sat and faithfully waited for you.

Do you hate me? Have I done something wrong? Do you think I've strayed? I admit, I've been watching a lot of VH1 lately, but they have I Love the '90s and Best Week Ever and all those shows where they talk about how rich celebrities are. Your sub-par dating shows just can't compete. We've talked about this before: I thought we worked it out! Nothing I that I've done, at least that I can think of, warrants what you gave me last night. I just can't take it anymore.

The yachts? Pulling up in yachts? Only the big rappers and hip-hop stars complied. Any normal rock star has too much integrity to pull a stunt like that, and I'm sick of P. Diddy and his big boats/cars/trucks/stunts. It's boring. He needs to lay low for a while. And Mase! I know he's relaunching his career and all, but I'm sick of seeing his face blocking people I care about. And speaking of people I care about, where were they? Did they not make your invite list? I saw barely any celebrities on the red carpet; it's like they just didn't feel like traveling to Florida. I understand, of course: New York is much more interesting.

And oh, your stage! I felt so bad for all the people in the audience watching live; half of them got to see celebrity backs the whole time and nothing else. The stadium you used was simply too large, and the stage design was way to schizophrenic. It felt like none of the presenters, winners or performers were playing to the audience, just to the camera. It's understandable, of course, because the audience was all around them and impossible to face! And stop having people perfom in the big mosh pit of normal fans: you can only see them on TV and if this is just a TV thing than you may as well scrap the live audience, right?

And please, MTV, I'm begging you: stop playing song medlies! Contrary to popular opinion, most of the American-and certainly the international audience-is able to listen to an entire three-minute song! There's no need to stop halfway and start another one; it just leaves us wondering what happened to the second verse we like so much. You and your artists should have more respect for us than that.

And, also, stop repeating performers and performances. We heard "Hey Ya!" last year, and even though it's a great song, there are other exciting things that have been released which we would like to see even more. Even Andre 3000 sounded annoyed that he had to play it.

MTV, I'm giving you one last chance. Bring the VMAs back to Radio City Music Hall. Start inviting cutting-edge performers on the show. Hey, if you start playing more videos on your channel, you might even get a more ecclectic and exciting nominee pool! You can do it, MTV. And if you don't, I'm not wasting my time ever again.