Stars and viewers alike were pleased Sunday night when the 58th Annual Emmy Awards ran only three hours. But none was so relieved as comedian Bob Newhart, who spent the ceremony trapped inside of what host Conan O'Brien claimed was an airtight capsule with exactly three hours of air. O'Brien warned the nominees that if their speeches lasted too long, "Bob Newhart dies." Whether from a desire to save the television icon or out of plain humility, the winners-who included the folks behind 24, the cast of The Office and The Daily Show bunch-kept the rambling to a minimum. Newhart, who looked increasingly concerned as the night wore on, was freed from his plexiglass prison in time to prevent a senseless death at the age of 76.

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Gene Simmons is more intimidating than most. As lead singer and bass guitarist of the glam rock band KISS, Simmons was a makeup-slathered, blood-and-fire-spewing, long tongue-bedecked spectacle that 1970s parents suspected of demonic influences. So who does a guy like that look up to? Aleister Crowley? Alice Cooper?

Not even close. In a video message released by Israel's Channel 2 Saturday, Simmons expressed his admiration for one Ron Weinreich, an Israeli soldier and die-hard KISS fan who was paralyzed from the waist down two weeks ago during hostilities between his country and Lebanon.

"Hi Ron, this is Gene Simmons. I'm talking to you from my home. I can't tell you how proud I am of you, and how much the world and Israel owes you a debt of gratitude," Simmons said on the tape. The recording was aired in honor of Weinreich's brother's wedding, which was relocated to Ron's hospital so the whole family could attend.

"From the bottom of my heart, you are a real hero, you are everybody's hero, you are my hero and I wish I could be there with you," Simmons said.

He then added in Hebrew, "My name is Chaim, I was born in Haifa." Indeed, Simmons, a.k.a. Chaim Witz, was raised in Israel until the age of nine, when he immigrated to New York with his mother Florence, a concentration camp survivor.

No word yet on Weinreich's response. We like to hope that the brother of the groom forced the wedding party to celebrate with a rousing rendition of "L'Gene."

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Friends star Matt LeBlanc is caught up in a most unfriendly situation. Alliterative stripper Stephanie Stephens has filed a defamation lawsuit against the actor after discovering that the National Enquirer had published comments about her, allegedly told by LeBlanc to a friend, claiming that she gave LeBlanc a private lap dance and engaged him in a night of "sexual debauchery ... at her place of employment."

Stephens denies the allegations, and the lawsuit insists that "all sexual contact between the defendant and the plaintiff took place in the privacy of (Stephens') residence." While some may see little difference between private subdued sex at home and private, wild sex at a strip club, Stephens does have a point. Who wants to be known as the woman who got freaky with Joey Tribbiani?