Can you remember the last time you were invited to an event? Normally, it makes us feel included and happy-that is, unless the event happens to fall under the categories "black tie," "white tie," "formal," or terms even more ambiguous or intimidating. So, what is it about these seemingly-innocuous dress codes that make us feel so anxious and uneasy? Where most college-aged students no longer fear and avoid dressing up, many are uncomfortable with certain dress codes simply because they do not know what they mean.

In all honesty, there is more flexibility than you might assume given a wedding invitation that says "black tie" and implies "not optional." If you ever went to Cotillion, you may have been taught that white tie means formal, and black tie means semi-formal. Technically, that may be-but as our culture progresses, white tie has become somewhat obsolete and black tie has become increasingly indicative of a formal event.

Black tie (or formal) is relatively specific regarding the type of dress required. For men, a formal event requires a tuxedo, complete with a tuxedo shirt, leather dress shoes and a black tie (bow ties make for a sophisticated classic look; but neckties are equally acceptable).

Just a note: cufflinks and studs are required but contrary to popular opinion, there's no rule that studs and cufflinks must match. In fact, if you're going for a more contemporary look, having a sleek necktie paired with colorful cufflinks is the way to go!

Although many women may feel the need to wear a long gown to every formal affair, senior proms are perfect examples of black tie events graced by plenty of fun and short, yet elegant dresses.

The first-year dance Saturday evening was a semi-formal black and white ball. This particular event called for a stricter dress code than other similar events. Where a semi-formal usually requires a suit and tie for men and any kind of evening dress for women, this one required exclusively black and white attire. Now, as I told the students at my prep school: just because you are required to wear certain colors doesn't mean that you have to be boring about it! As Yael Rooks-Rapport '09 demonstrates (see print edition for picture), you can embellish a simple black dress with some elegant, colorful jewelry. The cut of the dress and the glow of her dcolletage lend themselves perfectly to the medium-sized necklace with matching bracelet and coordinated earrings.

The balance between creativity and social appropriateness is exactly what makes someone well-dressed at events with a dress code. So don't be afraid to mix patterns, colors and textures to make a statement-just don't forget to look in the mirror before you leave the house.