These letters have all been sent in by actual Brandeis students. Their names have been changed to protect their anonymity. The advice given out in this column is solely the opinion of Rachel Nazarian '03, the Justice's advice guru. Please use this advice at your own risk - the Justice is not to be held liable for any positive or negative consequences of your decisions. If you are interested in obtaining advice from Rachel, to be printed in a future issue, e-mail her your problem at nazarian@brandeis.edu.

Dear Rachel:

I went to a party last weekend, and a girl I know was acting like she really wanted to be with me. She grabbed my arm the whole time, and acted like she wanted to kiss me. It was obvious she was drinking during the party, but I'm sure she wasn't too drunk to not remember. This week she saw me and acted like it didn't even happen. Should I remind her and see if she's still interested in me?

- "Questioning Confrontation"



Dear "Questioning:"

There's no sense in reminding someone of their drunken behavior; most likely, she knows how she presented herself in front of you. Approaching her with stories of her actions won't help you in your pursuit. When people are drunk - or under any influence - they may not behave in the most rational manner.

Many people regret things they've done or said when thoroughly inebriated. You're in college - I know you've heard plenty of stories. For some people, however, inhibitions sublimate with a few drinks. This girl may have been too shy to approach you in her sobriety. I can't decipher her intentions with your sole example.

Rather, if you want to determine the level and authenticity of her interest (and I'm assuming you want to start a relationship, not just satisfy curiosity), your best course of action is to ask her out: suggest dinner, coffee, etc. If she's interested, she'll take you up on your offer; if not, you should let the matter drop.

- Rachel



Dear Rachel:

I'm very happy with my boyfriend, but I'm beginning to hate his friends. Whenever I stop by his suite, no one looks happy to see me. Actually, they look a little upset, like I'm not welcome. I mentioned it to my boyfriend and he says they all like me. I don't have any past history with them that justifies the way they act. I'm obviously not going to stop visiting my boyfriend, so what option is left for me? He's not living with them all next year, so should I just deal with it for another month?

- "Wanting to be Welcome"



Dear "Wanting:"

Imagine yourself in their place. Let's say your close friend is dating a boy who stops by to see her in your suite. When he's there, you'll have less time to spend with her, although you've been seeing less of her lately anyway. Further, you and your other suitemates can't have the same relaxed atmosphere with a guy around: no walking around in towels, etc. ... right? Regardless, you probably have to modify your behavior a little.

Additionally, what if you wanted to talk to her about something important? It would probably be harder with her boyfriend around, especially if it's something more personal and private.

I'm not saying you're necessarily treading on territory where you shouldn't be; you're a priority in your boyfriend's life, and he's made the decision to spend time with you rather than with others. But when you walk into that suite, you're also stepping into the home of others - so be respectful.

Are you flying past them on the way to your boyfriend's room? Do you stop and ask how they're doing, or just ignore them if they're sitting in the lounge? You should make a point of talking to them and getting to know them better, especially if you're going to be around often. Although they may not be living together next year, they'll probably still spend time with each other. The more they can see you as a friend and less as an intruder, the better off you'll be. They'll be pleased to see you if you make a point of being happy to see them - not just your boyfriend.

- Rachel



Dear Rachel:

I really hate all the classes I'm taking. They all sounded so good in the bulletin, but in reality they're so dull! The professors don't seem to care when I'm in class, but make a big deal about missing class. I was told to go to office hours and get to know them, but they just want to meet if I have problems with class work, which I usually don't. I'm getting very good grades in the classes, but I just hate having to sit through the lectures. Why doesn't Brandeis offer interesting, fun classes?

- "Malcontent in Class"



Dear "Malcontent:"

I'm sorry to hear you're so dissatisfied with your classes. I can guarantee that once you discover what subject interests you, you'll enjoy listening to lectures regarding it, no matter who the professor is. Further, if you really want to study a topic that's not offered at Brandeis, approach the department and petition to have that course taught.

You should be seeking out professors with good reputations for student relationships. To begin, check out the course evaluation guide. To really ensure a riveting class, ask around. See what classes your friends are taking, where they enjoy the lectures and what professors they love or act as advisors. I can assure you that versions of Professor Dan Perlman and Professor William Silen exist in departments other than biology, which I can adamantly vouch for. It's important to have a pleasantly memorable class experience, but it is something that is almost exclusively brought about by the professors.

- Rachel



Humorous Letter of the Week:



Dear Rachel:



I know you are graduating next year. So, where am I supposed to go for advice?!



- "Nervous over Nothing"



Dear "Nervous:"



I'll leave a forwarding address.



- Rachel