I will be the first to admit that, generally speaking, I am a rock 'n' roll kind of girl. Classic rock, indie rock, punk rock, chick rock and pop rock ... I go for most of it. I will also admit that I'm not one who usually strays from type. It's true; I'm a bit of a music snob. But nonetheless, I consider myself fairly open-minded when it comes to music. In fact, some of my favorite bands have been introduced to me through blind risk-taking. I am not a purist by far.That being said, Patty Larkin's latest offering, "Red = Luck," is truly awful. If I were Superman, this would be my kryptonite. As it is, I spent most of the time listening to the album wishing that I weren't.

Larkin used her most recent studio time to record something she described as a place where "the ancient strains of modal folk meet brooding ambient noise." She also claims it to have elements of Middle Eastern music, joyous pop and "playful eroticism." Sadly, all of these things are lacking on this album. I was able to detect no shred of Middle Eastern influence, except the already trite use of a chromatic scale in opening the first song, "All That Innocence." The "playful eroticism" was obviously buried very deep in the album as well: Not only did I not hear it on any tracks, but there is not even a parental advisory sticker on the album. And, what about the joyous pop? Depending on what you call "joyous pop," it's there. But, it's not my definition of the genre.

The main problem with "Red = Luck" is the true listlessness of Larkin's music and her nonsensical lyrics. The tepid folk song "Birmingham" is the perfect example of her failed attempts at making music. The music is plain and uninspiring. Larkin's voice is extremely breathy, causing the vocal track to practically squeak as air floods it. And, Larkin's lyrics are completely ridiculous. "We live on the edge of a brand new world order," Larkin sings with what she deems passion, "Breaking down factories / breaking down borders." The message seems connected to the song title there (after all, Birmingham has been a center of social change many times), but the next lyric just tears it all down into a pile of confusion: "The dream's still alive in Birmingham / Birmingham is just a place / Birmingham is just a place to be."

This nonsensical gibberish, paired with truly uninspiring music, is what makes this album so awful. There's nothing to grab onto, nothing to pique the listener's interest. There is barely any change between each song, and what is there just makes it worse. "24/7/365" tries to go for a techno-new age feel and comes off sounding stupid and contrived. And, the title track is 1:12 of pointless instrumental guitar. And, the guitarist isn't even that good.

Sure, this album might be able to suffice for pretty background noise in, say, a department store, but that's about it. It's certainly nothing you should waste your own time or money on.