These letters have all been sent in by actual Brandeis students. Their names have been changed to protect their anonymity. The advice given out in this column is solely the opinion of Rachel Nazarian '03, the Justice's advice guru. Please use this advice at your own risk -- the Justice is not to be held liable for any positive or negative consequences of your decisions. If you are interested in obtaining advice from Rachel, to be printed in a future issue, e-mail her your problem at nazarian@brandeis.edu.

Dear Rachel,

I am thinking about taking a class that sounds very interesting to me. But, there is a problem. Last semester, I took another class in this subject and there was a very annoying girl who sat near me. Rachel, this girl talks all the time and leads every discussion! I feel like she is trying to teach the class rather than the professor. I'm sure I'm not the only one who felt this way. She made this class so painful to sit through. Who wants to hear about the life of someone they don't know!? Anyway, it looks like she is going to take this other class with me too. I really don't think I could stand to have the same thing happen again. How can I get her to be less involved in the class? Is that fair of me? I'm not looking forward to having to hear about her life instead of learning, and am debating whether even to sign-up for the class.

-- Questioning a Class



Dear Questioning,

Sign-up for the class. Never let someone deprive you of a potentially wonderful experience. If you are interested in a particular subject, take the opportunity to learn more about it. Now, regarding the slight complication of company: This semester she may not have the chance to contribute as much as last semester; the class size may be too large to allow discussion. If not, assess the situation. Should you find her to be as disrupting as before, approach your professor after class. He should be able to empathize with your situation. A student who is consistently interposing herself will cause the class to fall behind in the lecture. No professor is comfortable when thrown off schedule. Keep in mind, however, that you may be enrolled in a class that encourages students to contribute their thoughts. Obviously, a student will refer to their own life experiences, how else do we relate to each other with such understanding? If you find this to be the case, why not incorporate your own thoughts to the lecture? This approach will encourage other students to do the same, as they may relate better to you. Further, the student who has primarily spoken will become aware of the many others who wish to share their stories. She appears to be very excited with the subject matter, and will appreciate learning from the accounts of other students.

Many people have lessons learned in their life, and stories of interest -- or unfortunately, sometimes, of no interest -- that they feel others can benefit from hearing. In short, to answer your question, perhaps you can listen to the voices of others in your class, and simultaneously learn from them. Quite rarely is a professor the only person with knowledge to share.

-- Rachel



Dear Rachel,

I don't know if you are supposed to answer questions like this. Are you like a "Dear Abby" or can you answer questions about Martha Stewart-household-fixing stuff and random topics? Usually I see problems about boyfriends and girlfriends. But I'm going to ask anyway just in case. I spilled red punch on a white shirt. Do you know how I can get it out?

-- Stuck with a Stain



Dear Stuck,

I am here to help answer any questions you may have; it may regard relationships, personal dilemmas even Martha Stewart-type questions, like that which you raised. At any rate, I do have a quick cure to your injurious punch stain. Go to a grocery store nearby and pick up a box of Borox. Fill a bowl with half Borox and half warm water, and let the shirt dip in. You should find that the stain lifts out. I haven't tried this on colored shirts, and don't know if I would risk it. Regardless, I have found that it works very well with white clothes, even white lace. Anyway, feeling I've lost half my audience talking about laundry, I'll move on.

-- Rachel



Dear Rachel,

A very close friend of mine has been urging me to go on a date with this guy friend. I think he's a nice guy, but I don't know him extremely well. I just don't think we'd have very much to talk about. My friend thinks that's a weak answer, and is still insisting that I go out on one date. How can I tell her I'm not interested?

-- Dreading a Date



Dear Dreading,

It sounds like your friend is doing what she believes would make two people in her life happier. I'm sure she has your best interest at heart, and didn't intend to apply such pressure. Appreciate her efforts; she is advocating a close friend for you, not a stranger. This, at the very least, illustrates her standards in finding you a good boyfriend. However, her request is clearly making you uncomfortable. Is this because you're scared of being disappointed in a relationship? Perhaps you're not scared, but merely not interested in seeing someone at the moment. If you do not desire a relationship, she needs to respect and understand your position. Assert your thoughts clearly and firmly. Tell her, "Thank you for thinking of me, but I'm not looking for a relationship right now. I'm grateful for your thoughtfulness, and I'll let you know when I'm ready to be involved." Internally, however, debate whether you're letting your nerves take charge. You mention concern over having good conversation with him. Why allow such fears to impede you? There is truly nothing to lose. I can attest that wonderful relationships may never be predicted.

Recently I agreed to try out a relationship. Thinking I would only confirm my doubts of anything substantial, I was surprised to find someone I was eager to learn more about. Trust your friend, and her judgment. If it doesn't work out, you've lost nothing, and gained better ideas of what you're looking for (or what you're not looking for). Life is full of opportunities, and potential. I know you've heard the saying "you never know unless you try." On the same level, I say keep your eyes open and remind yourself to consider everything. We all have potential to be unexpectedly impressed.

-- Rachel



Humorous letter of the week:

Dear Rachel,

Once again I am coming to you with my sorrows, only this time it's more personal. I love my girlfriend very much. Recently she has started hinting and making comments about ... you know ... the length of it. At first I had no idea how to feel or what to say. I had no idea it was such a big deal. I mean, I have looked around in the locker room and I see all different lengths ... some short, some long ... and some just right. I am turning to your ear once again asking you what I should do. Rachel, do you think my hair is too short or should I grow it out?

-- Concerned by Coif



Dear Concerned,

First off, I have no way of giving my true opinion on a hairstyle I have yet to see; however, a hairstyle should have no weight upon the success of a relationship. If you feel it holds great importance to your girlfriend, and she's unconcerned with your desires, reservations should be made regarding your involvement with her. Nonetheless, if you have no preference of length, and your girlfriend simply finds you to be more attractive with a particular style, why not humor her and play along?

(As a side note, your ambiguity in writing might lead to misunderstanding later on. I originally thought this letter too crude to print when reading the initial sentences. Let's work on that.)

-- Rachel