These letters have all been sent in by actual Brandeis students. Their names have been changed to protect their anonymity. The advice given out in this column is solely the opinion of Rachel Nazarian '03, the Justice's advice guru. Please use this advice at your own risk - the Justice is not to be held liable for any positive or negative consequences of your decisions. If you are interested in obtaining advice from Rachel, to be printed in a future issue, e-mail her your problem at nazarian@brandeis.edu.

Dear Rachel:

Are people always ready for Mr. or Ms. Right, and it is only a matter of finding that right person? My boyfriend and I just recently broke up and after debating this idea for a long while I have come to the conclusion that this is true; people do not want to be alone, and although they have their friends, they continuously search for that special partner. I thought my boyfriend felt the same, as everything with us was wonderful. Then, out of the blue, he told me that he wants to be alone. I guess at the root of it all, I just feel confused by his sudden change of heart. Please help.

- Wondering What Went Wrong



Dear "Wondering":

I sincerely wish I had the right words to console you. Truly, matters of the heart cannot always be understood. But, to answer your question, I find that people are continually and constantly looking for somebody to love; we are at all times searching for Mr. or Ms. Right.

But, no, we are not always ready for them when they arrive. As human beings, we are perpetually changing. What we find appealing at one age may in fact be a fleeting fetish. The person with whom we would be most compatible may be in front of our noses, and we fail to notice until years later when our hearts snap into place. It is peculiar that we may seek and find someone we love, change our minds, then return later when our ever-altering desires diminish.

Do not be discouraged; as we change, the people in our life change as well. But, I have found life tends to repeat itself and old faces make new appearances. His need to stir is not an indication of your value in his life. You are as beautiful and intelligent as you ever were. Let him pursue what he presently longs for. You must not attempt to make sense of his behavior and his decision; if you understood everything he was thinking, you would be him!

Rather, embrace the changes you yourself are experiencing and acknowledge the wonderful relationship you had. There will be many who thrill you and many who confuse you. You will be ready for your Mr. Right the day you meet him: no preparation is necessary for happiness.

- Rachel



Dear Rachel:

My roommate is a pig. She is gross, gross, gross! How can I train her to stop making such a mess? I have to live in her filth.

- Tired of the Trash



Dear "Tired":

For those of us verging on the anal retentive, a sock out of place can drive us into frenzy. We adhere the rules of housekeeping providing the right place for each item. Although we may think ourselves always in the right, we are quite often mistaken. This is most likely not what you wish to hear, but your roommate has a right to her mess. She doesn't need to organize her books; she's under no obligation to hang her clothes.

In spite of that, there is a limit. Her mess is hers alone, so long as it doesn't interfere with you directly. She may have a mountain of shoes in her own closet or a heap of papers on her own desk. The minute she crosses into your territory (your bed, your desk, etc.) you may spring into action. I wondered about your wording "living in her filth." Do you directly have to manage her mess? If so, approach her now and present the guidelines of your living arrangement clearly. If you find her to be unreceptive, unwilling or unable to comply with these basic rules of etiquette, you should find a different roommate for next semester.

- Rachel



Dear Rachel:

Last year, I was involved with a boy. But, this year he has a girlfriend. Yet, by they way he acts, I think he still likes me. What should I do in this type of situation? Because I still like him and we talk a lot, do you think I should give this a chance?

- Rethinking Retry



Dear "Rethinking":

I speculate you're not an avid reader of my column. You battle the same problem as a previous writer (see the Oct. 8 issue). Despite this, let me suggest a similar rule of thumb: Do not pursue boys in relationships. I understand you enjoy his company. But, he is not available now for intimate encounters.

Save your time and save yourself by finding someone new to dote on. As an attached person, he is disrespecting his girlfriend if he is encouraging your pursuance. Further, you deserve someone who will place you as top priority. Never settle for being second chair, which you will do if you render yourself accessible to his advances. To quote myself: "Acknowledge the position of degradation you've been put into; demand the respect you deserve and walk away."

Should he be the ideal boy for you, he will return unattached.

- Rachel



Humorous letter of the week:

Dear Rachel:

Doesn't it seem to make you sad,

Listening to troubles - always bad?

Everyone complains to you.

Boo Hoo. Boo Hoo. Boo Hoo Hoo.

- Letter in Lyrics



Dear "Letter":

You think you're funny.

I'll play your game.

Here's the truth:

Your poem's lame.

- Rachel